e urge of going to e hotel for few hrs just for a gd sleep was so strong last evening..
i was so so tired.. mind going blank..
i nd a gd zz.. so badly.. i nearly went to any hotel just to zz tht few hrs last evening..

sound so poor thg right.....? lol

well, in e end i didn't..
cos i m afraid i wil end up nvr wake up fr my zz...
ppl wil end up wondering y i died in a hotel alone..

so, i went for a massage instead.. hoping to ease e bk pain..
& hoping to hv a bettr zz last night..

ended up, stil unable to zz well cos of e pain..
worry for my over exhausted body & mind..

ever since sch hols, i avg zz ard 2am..
earliest is 1plus am, worst is almost 3am..
means since joey finish his O, which is mid nov til now..
2mths alrdy..? everyday zz for 4-5hrs..

last night he finally notice his poor mummy..
he said, "u zz 1st, dun wait for me.."
i told him "cn nt... i hv to wait for u to zz 1st cos i snore v loud"
he said "aiya, nvm abt ur snore la.. u just zz 1st"

i always feel so poor thg.
i dun hv a rm for me to rest..
b it tired, or sick..
i dun hv my own privacy..
i dun hv a tv to watch, nt even news..
i dun hv a pl to sit (i usually sit at e dining table or on e flr)
i dun hv pl to put my stuffs, everythg is 'squeeze'.....

well, i dun deny i hv other privilege thou..
such as, i dun nd to wash my clothes,
i dun nd to iron my clothes, i dun nd to fold my clothes,
i dun hv to tidy my rm, or bed, or cabinets,
i dun hv to pay a single cents to stay in a condo

u hv sm, u lost sm..


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