almost 4mths didn't blog..
besides wk & home, i m bz with my mum..

she doesn't seems to get better althou doc says she is better.
she is now at the 'mental' ward & doc tied her cos she keeps wanting to go home.
doc also put a feeding tube into her nose, cos she refused to eat & take her medi..

she started to talk to herself sometimes.
she will forget who is tht person or where is she.
sm of e thgs she remember, sm of e thgs she couldn't rememeber.
her body ache & itch seems alot better as compare to at home.
e strange thg is, doc is giving her 'mental' medi rather thn body ache medi..

heard fr small aunt yi, big uncle (mum's eldest brother) is coming over on sunday to visit mum.
we shall see hw it goes.. to put mum in nursing home is e best for her & us, cos thr will be professional ppl taking care of her. But e thg is, nursing home don't wana take her in cos she will get agitated, scold ppl, or talk v loudly..

she always cries & say y dun just let her go, y she has to go thru all e pain etc..
but she isn't a gd gal.. she split out the food & medi.. sigh..

i m v much affected by her.. besides taking care of her thou not full time,
i hv to deal with wht she said & told tht woman.. seriously dun like tht woman..
a cunning woman who lies..

thr r days i couldn't zz well.. woke up every hourly or 2 hourly..
m thinking m i too stress...?

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started diet.. need to push myself to exercise..
m reali not keen in exercising.. dun like to move.. *roll eye*
but.. no choice.. m getting fatter & fatter even with e same amount of food.
i hv to add alot alot alot of 'oil'.. i hv to push myself to exercise..

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looking forward to penang..
thou is a v short & not far trip..
but on e other hand.. m worry cos is a small plane..
cross finger it will b ok ..

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quarter of e yr has gone.. heading to may soon..
unable to predict wht wil happen next..
but i notice, ppl of my age, parents r in a way link to hospital.
my mum is sgh, uncle john & victor's dad r both at tts.
we r getting old... so r our parents..

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joey is now with jeff at e heart centre..
his 1st ns check up failed.. they asked him to go heart centre agn today..
hopefully he is ok..

he has grown up.. dun need me like he used to anymore..
happy in a way, cos has grown independent.. alittl sad in a way,
cos he dun glue me anymore.. haha.. mixture of feelings, probably only mother will understd..

both boys working v hard on studies.. m v glad tht i need nt worry much in tis area.
i dun ask for much.. just wan thm to live healthy & happy..

m walking towards 50.. tot of tht.. scary..
every few weeks white hairs coming out..
e rate is so fast & much tht i cun colour my hair so often to cover thm anymore..
so, hv to leave with many white hair longer, & only cover thm up whn importn days r here.

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dear is also bz.. i hv to take care of his darlings whn he is at wk..
hope they wil understd their father's hard wk, hope they wil b more sensible..
study hard..

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